From the "As If I, An American Woman, Didn't Have Enough To Consider In My Current Beauty Routine" files -- I offer up Belly Button Love Potion Fragrance. Which is fragrance. For your belly button. Seriously.

You can also buy this stuff here at Sephora for $34, which, if the concept of this product alone didn't upset/confuse you, then surely the price will knock your socks right off.

$34 for belly button gloss endorsed by Jessica Simpson? Clearly I am getting old, or rather getting cheap AND old because this seems like a lot to pay for something you literally stick in your belly button, even if it DOES taste yummy and even if it DOES attract nice morally upstanding men like Nick Lachey.