My nose hurts. My face hurts. My throat hurts. I look....REALLY BAD. Colds suck. In 24 hours, I'll be getting on a plane and if I feel the way I have for the past three days then someone is going get an ass whipping at the United ticket counter.

And here I have exciting new year's plans for the first time in...years. Not sure I'll be able to buck up for it. Can't think until I get back home.

Heading back downstairs for some hot tea and some more VH1's I Love The 70's. If that can't cure me, then nothin' can...

DAMMIT. Head cold has struck me down in the midst of Christmas vacation. Thankfully it only seems to be a bad case of the sniffles which has resulted in a very Rudolph-like appearence. I'm typing this now in a Benedryl haze...the colors! The letters! Think it's going to be a mellow next couple of days as I drink tea and do some hard core vegging.

Best Quote of 2003, Thus Far (Overheard at the Seattle airport, as a mother was trying to calm her 2-year old before going through security): "Honey, you've got to try and keep the grumpies INSIDE."

Let's all keep that in mind for 2004, please?

Ah, the post-Christmas afterglow! Just a quick little stop by and then we're off to the mall to get my contacts checked out. I got these new contacts for my Christmas present over the Thankgiving break (sure sign I am an adult is that I was positively GIDDY over a trip to the eye doctor), but they're all itchy and irritating after about six hours. We'll see if I need to start learning braille anytime soon.

So wonderful to be here and to have a chance to spend some time with friends and family without having to be rushed back to Seattle. Had the chance to meet 3-month old Tony Johnson, perhaps the warmest and snuggliest baby in the history of babies and to also see Christie Smith, who was pretty warm and snuggly herself.

Off to the mall...let the feeling of being 12 and back at Southwest Plaza with my mother begin again!

SPAM or Poetry? An actual SPAM email that I received at work today:

Subject line: Re: BM, goethe once refers

Message:

oral sentry pineapple h's catalina hypnotic swelter descend haberdashery qed herman benefice downslope driveway cackle deceptive contralto crystallite canvas isle adventure gear fellow boathouse fine colorimeter automotive sense crisscross involve endure barter afloat burst inputting averring callaghan flail jacobson barr workout indignant patsy boatswain whimper babysit enviable bicker bushmaster ferrer ludlow assuage chasm whittle coroutine latex excelled moran rectify alfalfa cardiac cacophony dazzle extravaganza bunny gone parade deterring lug abrasion transcendent jove nottingham.

FAQ for Saturday night:

Q: Your blog says it features the adventures of Thomas the Wonder Cat. Currently, your Thomas-related adventure count is zilch. What's the deal?
A: Okay, I admit I've not mentioned Sir Thomas Khmer of Orange very often. Fact is, he hasn't been doing much lately except sleeping, barfing and running around frantically after he pees. He seems to have forgiven me for leaving him over the Thanksgiving holiday, and seems (thankfully) oblivious to my upcoming travel. He enjoys watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy every Tuesday. His favorite Fab Fiver is Kyan because he understands the importance of cleanliness and grooming.

Q: What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?
A: Literary magazine editor. Or cheesemaker. Or editor of a literary magazine about cheese.

Q: What is your favorite animal?
A: With apologies to Thomas the Wonder Cat, I'd say the Japanese snow monkey. Or pandas. Both are cute to the point of being slightly ridiculous.

Q: Who would win in a fight, Elmo or Grover?
A: My money's on Grover. You can also take a quiz here of which muppet's dark secret you are hiding.

Q: What sound or noise do you love?
A: That little fanning sound that comes out of an ATM machine right before it spits out your money, as if there's a little tiny person in there counting out your twenties before it spits them out at you.

Today is just a glorius day of nonstop yummy food. Beginning with blueberry bagels from a co-workers birthday (lots of aliteration to boot), followed by lunch at Wild Ginger (consisting of sea bass satays, duck hum bow, seven flavor beef...hmmmm) for our office Christmas lunch, to be followed EVEN FURTHER by dinner at Beppo's with the gang, which will inevitably involve a giant carafe of red wine, bruschetta and macaroni rosa. Can feel the elastic pants coming out already....

Yesterday it was raining so hard that my window resembled a shower door...very grim indeed. But today! Sunshine! In Seattle! Arctic temperatures, but the sun is indeed shining and therefore life can't be all bad today.

Spent all of yesterday in an overworked coma-state. Didn't get anything done and everything seemed to rub me the wrong way. Felt like growling all day. My contacts were misbehaving, so I had to wear my glasses -- which is always disorienting. Made me feel clumsy and askew all day, like my depth perception had been taken away from me.

So wanted to bail on book club, but bucked up and went. It was hard. However, heavily-spiked egg nog was provided, so that made the decision easier. Next selection will be Fortress of Solitude by Jonathan Lethem.

Thinking more and more about the new year ahead. Have entitled 2004 to be the NON BEIGE YEAR. Trying to think about how to spice it up...to make more of it...not not waste it by getting trapped in the routine of minutia. Comprehensive list making is imminent. Any suggestions for how to avoid another vanilla beige year?

Don't judge me too harshly, but these Homestyle Bakes from Banquet are TASTEEE. I've passed by them in the store for some time now and normally hold up my nose at them in dismissal...but they were on sale last week and I figured if I survived my childhood eating canned spaghettios, will a canned version of chicken and dumplings really kill me?

Sodium rich-preservative packed food is just GOOD sometimes.

I am just speechless. Sat down tonight to do some gift wrapping and lay out all the gifts bought thus far so that I could figure out what was left to buy. And here I was feeling pretty smug and crafty since I've been doing little things every now and then since October it seems like...and now that it's all spread out around me it really amounts to not much besides some pretty tissue paper, a few tins to put cookies in (but no cookies) and a few gifts. I am nowhere NEAR being done with shopping. Super.

One more week of work and then its back to Denver. I'm looking forward to having a little more time there, and hope I won't have to spend too much time with the laptop worrying about work. I think it will be good to have some extended time in the homestead -- it always gives me a new perspective -- for better or worse -- at my life here in Seattle. It's like I have absolutely no responsibilities when I'm in Denver, I revert to being twelve and to meeting my friends from high school at the mall. Which isn't BAD persay, but it always gives some a new appreciation for being on my own out here. We'll see how it goes. I can't think too much about Denver or else I won't want to focus on work this week and I really need to be heads down for this final week....

We'll see how it goes.

I'm irked that the font on the left side of this somehow randomly became larger as you scroll down and that I can't fix it. Siiiigh.

Felt hermitlike today and so I stayed inside, sleeping, watching bad infomercials and TLC's "Rally 'Round the House." And now, here it is, almost 10 and I'm bored to death and starved for human interaction. I should have at least gone for a walk, or tried to take pictures downtown like I've been meaning to. Instead, I puttered around all day long, not really doing much of anything except watching infomercials about the Turbo Wave Express Convection Oven and that set of really sharp knives.

I wrote out my Christmas cards tonight and instead of cheering me up, the whole process just made me feel depressed and disappointed in how I treated a lot of my friends this year. I blew a lot of people off this year -- put off trips that were long overdue, didn't call like I should have, didn't send birthday cards. This seems to have been the year of "I'll get around to it..." and never doing it.

We're heading into a new year shortly and my mind is thinking of how I want things to be different. I reflect on the previous year and I'm disappointed in it -- it was a year where nothing catastrophic happened (thank God, although there were scary moments), but nothing truly wonderful happened either. It was just a very...BLAH...year and that's upsetting. It worries me to put too much stock in New Year's resolutions and the reassuring feeling that with the new year comes a clean slate. Already I'm thinking -- okay, THIS is the year where I really start saving money and transform my body and meet someone and read better books and get out of my house more often...THIS YEAR it will really and truly be different and there's already the skepical voice in the back of my head popping up that fights it and doubts it.

Why will next year be different? I'll be 30, but what difference will that make? What all would I need to do and accomplish to make this next year less...beige? The mind boggles. Saturday night and I'm wrecked with uncertainty and self doubt and good intentions. Siiiiigh.

Random Things Seen Recently:

1.) Bitter with Baggage Seeks Same : The Life and Times of Some Chickens. Adorable little single woman scenes played out with fuzzy plastic chicks. Bizarre? Hilarious? Yes to both. Sign me up.

2.) In the candy cane cottage right outside of Nordstrom, Santa was, there's no other way to word it, workin' the crowd and schmoozin' up a storm. Shakin' hands, smiling and nodding on his way through the line up to his giant chair. Amusing little scene to walk by.

3.) On the bus tunnel on my way to work today, there was a musician playing Bach on one of those South American flutes. It was really lovely. Guy walking behind me gave him a dollar and wished him Merry Christmas. If he's there again tomorrow think I'll do the same.

Wanted to pass along a great 'zine I just found out about called Nervy Girl. They're based in Portland and it's packed with lots of great tips, stories, columns, etc.

I was just reading about easy to make DIY spa stuff here -- anything that provides access to cheap and easy-to-make facials, masks, scrubs and the like, especially in the winter, is goooooood.

A crafty night planned ahead with my friend Wendy to make up some gifts for folks. Have to keep the specifics mum because who knows -- maybe YOU, reading this right NOW -- could be the recipient of the very gifts we're making tonight. Where would the element of surprise be in that?

I can assure you, however, that we'll do our best at making....our mystery gifts. Are we making lamps? Homemade pillows? Cookies? Mittens? A 1978 Chevy Chevette replica? You'll have to be patient and see what we make for Santa to bring you....

Queer Eye tonight -- Yahoo. It gives Tuesdays a little extra sparkle. They're making over a former marine tonight -- not sure how compelling that will be, I mean how sloppy can a marine actually be?

Okay, so I have officially caught the holiday spirit. the problem is that now all I want to do is put up my tree, find those Christmas cards I bought last year in Denver and finish off all of my little projects and craftliness. However, that pesky employment thing keeps getting in my way. Siiigh.

Need to digress, slightly, and comment on the holiday movies that were on last night. Clearly we are scraping the bottom of the holiday programming barrel. There was "A Carol Christmas" -- a remake of A Christmas Carol, but with Tori Spelling has -- get this! -- a woman named Carol who learns to embrace the holiday spirit. (See, her name is CAROL -- and it's about CHRISTMAS -- get it?? CHRISTMAS CAROL?)

In addition, there was "Undercover Christmas," in which Jami ("Less Than Zero") Gertz played a hooker, or a witness, or something, who goes home with a rich single detective hired to protect her -- and ends up...well....not sure exactly. I couldn't take it and ended up watching Arrested Development with a 40-year old Jason Bateman.

Okay, I guess those aren't comments but more snide descriptions. Talk amongst yourselves.

A few random thoughts on Sunday night:

1.) Gnocci is harder to make than one would think.
2.) Damn, I really do not want to dig out that Christmas tree from the back of my closet.
3.) King of the Hill's Bobby Hill is freakin' HILARIOUS.
4.) Those enormous "value-sized" bottles of wine -- the ones that are the size of a 2-liter bottle of Coke -- are NOT a wise choice for a single woman to make, even when the Meridian merlot is on sale for $11.99.

Friday already -- clearly I am not too good at the daily blog idea. Finally back in Seattle where it is pouring rain and freezing. All I want to do this weekend is hang out at home, clean up my stuff and perhaps cook some yummy meals. Two and a half weeks to Christmas....let the countdown begin!

Greetings from Anaheim! Day one of the tradeshow insanity is slowly coming to a close as we're preparing for dinner at Benihana. I seem to be the only person in America that hasn't experienced the wonder of Benihana. Let the wonder begin! Hoping this will be a fun show and a good time away from home. We'll see how I'm feeling at midnight on Thursday when I finally roll back into Seattle....

I'm pooped. Didn't do much really but I'm ready for a nap. Mom and I met up with Steve, Linda and Robin for lunch at Denny's (note: my uncle Steve was diagnosed with cancer about two months ago...). She had prepared me for the absolute worst, and I was scared of what to expect, since I hadn't seen him for three years to begin with. Happy to report he looked a lot better than I had expected. Good sense of humor about everything too which was great to see.

Did the obligatory run to Sam's Club after that, but didn't buy anything. Found a wheel of brie for $8.99. Hard to pass that up. Actually, it was PAINFUL to pass that up.

Going to dinner tomorrow with Christie and Momma -- thinking of going to Beppo's, which is always yummy and fun. Bring on the macaroni rosa, baby.

Happy Turkey Day! So nice to be home and spend some time just hanging out with family. Was a very mellow day with Mom just the two of us and then onward to Dad's with the larger clan.

I forget what's its like to be with family, the ease of it, the unconditional-ness of it. I find so many people in Seattle who don't have family there -- people like me who moved when they were young, on a whim, just to get a change of scenery. Which ends up bonding us all together, even if just in a common experience -- we become each other's family during the year and then go home during the holidays to the real thing. It's comforting to have my family around me. It's a very simple and basic feeling, really, but its not something I experience throughout the year. It can be infuriating too -- maybe its best to be had in small bunches. But I forget what's it's like to be in a place where you have a history -- where you've failed, loved, laughed...where people know you and accept you on such a complete level.

I'm clearly giddy on family tonight. Talk to me after I've been here for 10 solid days and you'll probably get a much different story.

Homeward bound! Just doing a little work this morning before the shuttle picks me up. Can't wait to get to get to the airport and have a little while to just sit and chill and watch people. I'm a freak about airports -- I mean, it's practically Rainman like. Clearly my soul mate will have to have a deep understanding about airports or else the relationship will be doomed.

Fred Willard is on "Good Day Live" right now. He's trying to talk about acting and sound serious, but he's still the announcer from Dog Show to me. This entry is a little on the rambling side, so I'll sign off now and head for the Mile High City. See y'all soon....

Book club tonight -- we did Ian McEwan's Atonement. Not his best work, I thought, but still a good read. Next up, if the rumors are true, is the latest one by Jonathan Lethem. Guess this means I'll have to cut back on my Chick Lit for a while and focus on serious books. Sigh.

It's going to be a little nutty this week what with the trade show coming right after Thanksgiving. I'm just looking forward to going home for a while and seeing everyone and getting away for a bit, right before I head into the hurricane of a show. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and for now just trying to think of having lunch at the Olive Garden with my mom to get my mind off of everything I have to do before Wednesday....

Just chilling out with some coffee. Wonder Cat seems confused as to why I'm up before 10 a.m. and working on the laptop. As anyone who knows me call tell you, I am not up and active (if you can call sitting in a chair typing active) at this time of day.

Really dull day ahead. Have to clean the house, do about sixty loads of laundry, think about what to pack for these upcoming trips and find something creative to do with a four-pound spaghetti squash I bought last week. What the hell was I thinking with that?

So this is cyberspace. I was tossing and turning last night thinking nonstop about the new blog. Dreaming about the blog. Wondering what the blog will look like a year from now. This must be what new parents go through.

Attempted to make almond brittle tonight. I had visions of me providing cute holiday-themed tins full of candy -- that I made myself!-- to my parents when I see them next week. TOTAL DISASTER. Apparently all you're supposed to do is melt some sugar, throw in some almonds and then spread the nutty goo in a pan. Easy enough, right? In the first batch the sugar never turned "golden" and instead looked grey. Second batch turned to a consistency resembling playground gravel. Clearly, despite my recent crafty kick this month, I am not made to enter the candy-making realm.

Wow, Beth enters the online blogging world!