Sunday, December 12, 2004

Ikea the Heartbreaker

For some reason this morning, it occurred to me that at one time or another, everyone has their heart broken by Ikea.

Oh sure, we're lured in by the blond Swedish wood and the clean lines of the GROMICs and the FLURGENs and the cheap, cheap price tags. But then the romance fades and we become disillusioned and then we realize it Just Wasn't That Good To Begin With.

I recall being 22 and seeing Ikea for the first time and practically wetting myself with what seemed to be totally awesome furniture at cheap-ass prices. I had never SEEN furniture like this. Are you kidding me, this entertainment center is only $199? Is that possible? It was the proverbial kid in a candy store. I wanted everything in my house to be from Ikea, EVERYTHING.

My first major purchase was a "Miller" entertainment center and I vividly remember how I proudly marched up to the cashier feeling very smart indeed for finding such an affordable piece of classy furniture. (Okay, quick aside, 1.) "Miller" is a very disappointing name for anything from Ikea and 2.) An entertainment center with doors and matching side bookshelves for $199 should have raised a giant red flag)

And then it got delivered to my apartment. In a flat box. I literally gasped. What, why is it in a box? Where is my entertainment center? What do you MEAN I have to put it together? Are you kidding me? I can't do that! And then the light bulb went off that "Oh yes, Beth, THIS is why it's $199."

And I knew then that my love affair with Ikea had been tainted. It would never be the same.

No comments: